I have not updated trivia posts here for quite a while; however, I have been updating trivia bits on my Instagram account @ReadingFilms daily. Going forward, I will not post them here as they are already available there or on my Twitter account. Also, given the decline in hits of this blog, it does not motivate me to put them here. I will try to write normal posts on films, though I am contemplating if it makes sense to do that as well. I have been writing here for almost a decade, and I have come to the realization that I will never be a 'great writer.' I used to get restless earlier thinking about it, but now I have kind of accepted it. It does not bother me much. There is a certain freedom in acceptance. It makes me think everything I write here is pointless. And I get only two types of comments here, and I like neither of them, honestly. One, they say, I am a good observer. It makes me feel less valued, although they mean it well. A big part of writing is observing, and I have worked on this skill to improve a lot. It takes work to see. To research. To evaluate. To make sense of it. To find patterns. And the second type of comment that I hate more is that you think too much. I have clearly articulated all patterns with evidence. I wish more people understood that criticism has something called subtext.
My book also flopped (LOL). I sent my book to some friends, and they hardly even bothered to tell me how it was because they did not even read it. It hurts a little because if your friends behave like this, what to expect of others. Again, it does not bother me now. It is presumptuous of me to expect someone to take time out. People are busy in their lives. I should not have expected anything in the first place. The other bit I have realized is most people like to see you fail. I see this a lot on Twitter, and that is why I don't say anything personal on Twitter. I am very guarded.
Anyway, I have to think of my life ahead. We are all getting old. I don't want to waste my life. I want to live it well. I want to bring a change. I want a lot of things, but for that, I have to also work on a lot of things. Let's see how the next few months pan out.
I had the same feeling about Blogs downturn in the age of scoial media.
ReplyDeleteFirst thing, comparing hobby writing blog to influencer blog is not fair. As in, they have lot of support to make it refined that individual hobby writers dont have.
Secondly, there is a huge difference in those who have trained to write via degrees or courses or workshop versus those who write on their own. The trained people know the process, can not be demoralised by the unrefined product and they know the exact step to take to finish/refine the written end-product. Unless we go through the training, we will always feel we dont measure up to others.
Thirdly, Benefits of this consistent blogging is that it kept us in touch with the process of research, gathering thoughts, writing & improving our language. Without blogging, this would have stopped in 2005.
Lastly, comparision is the thief of joy.
Opened the blog as part of weekly ritual to find this extremely sad message. whatever be the compulsion, i am going to miss you my friend. there is a separate charm to read your blog. though your tweets are equally exciting. i wish you all the best and god bless you. since its your last blog one trivia from my side too. Dharma Production has same font to explain the location or date or anything else in all their movies of spy universe, beginning with dhoom.
ReplyDeleteReally enjoyed reading your posts, hope you continue writing here.
ReplyDeleteThis post has made me extremely sad. For me, you ARE a "great writer." You are precious. I still remember reading your blog on Ae Dil Hai Mushkil and going back to all of your earlier posts. Since then, I haven't missed reading a single piece of yours. Reading your blogs and tweets has given me so much joy. I enjoyed your book too. I think a movie should be watched twice, once before and once after reading your blog. I sincerely hope you'll continue to write.
ReplyDeleteHiii I appreciate you putting out your feelings about how you feel, which is good. But would suggest please keep writing you have an amazing skill. Just consider it as a phase. Have been following you on instagram and blogger and will continue to do so. In anticipation of your next article/post.
ReplyDeleteHii I really don't know whether you will read this or not, just how you expressed yourself was wonderful. But being a girl who lives in her own dreamy world of movies, this is the exact place where she finds her peace. I started reading your blogs about three months back and honestly you gave my thoughts "words". There are people like me who really adore your blogs and these blogs serve as therapy to them. I don't know what are your expectations for yourself , just please don't stop this.
ReplyDeleteHi! I just started writing blogs on films on medium. I've only released one real blog, and I'm already feeling disheartened. Even some of my closest friends did not respond to it. But I really enjoy your blogs. Your book on Dil Chahta Hai made me realize there is an audience out there for the things I am passionate about. I would love for you to continue blogging. Even if it isn't that frequent, because life happens, I would still be excited to read about films :))
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