Saturday, August 6, 2011

To Goa - My Muse, My Whore, My Beloved!



Goa..Saal me hamesha ek bar Goa to aana hi chahiye..
Ya.. now what do I write about this trip to Goa ya..There are so many things to write that I am not able to understand where to begin from..I am not a big fan of mountains..maybe because I am not ambitious or maybe I am scared of challenges. I just love the sea and can sit all day long on the beach..even if I don't have to do anything. 

So I had this flight from Delhi to Goa on Friday. The beauty of the clouds is just exhilarating..makes you feel like a bird but you know when I saw the clouds and the blue sky, I felt this feeling of extreme loneliness..as they say it is lonely at the top! There was nothing else visible in the sky except the clouds and our place. And when you fall from such heights, nothing can make you rise again. Then why do we say to reach for the sky or sky is the limit..is it because we want to be alone? Then why do we look for companions everywhere if we want to be high up than others? And then why do we say there is fortune at the bottom of the pyramid..isn't it a dichotomy? Can there be a middle path where we are equidistant from the top and the bottom? Is it too cowardly to not be an extremist?

Duniya ke saare sukh ek taraf aur Goa me kadam rakhne ki khushi ek taraf :) The hotel we stayed at has this private beach of its own..Aah..the sight of the sea is just amazing..the splashing noise of the waves..the whiteness of the waves..the furiousness of the waves..the deception of the waves.. 

I was at the beach till the night, playing with waves all the time..I just did not want to go back to the party where I feel lost. I could totally  understand what Arjun might have felt after his sea diving in Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara..Anyways, sitting at the beach, there is this flood of thoughts that come to your mind. I wish I could write poetry..managed only two lines :{ I wanted to write how waves can be a metaphor for the sadness in life.. Howsoever, we may try to stop the waves, they will come to shore. And they will once again go back to the sea. It is only you who has to bear them with strength. And when the waves go back, your feet are firmly entrenched in the sand, giving you the stability you always wanted. Although it may feel like the world is moving beneath your feet, it is actually putting your feet firmly in the ground. Now think of waves as the sadness..whatever we may try to stop, dukh to ayega hi na..aur har time thori rahega..vapas bhi chala jayega..bas tumhe khare rehna hai varna leher tumhe dooba degi..

Also, don't waves also mirror life..jaise taise everyone reaches their final destination..at the end, we all have to reach our shore and die!

The following are the two lines..

समुंदर का वो खारा पानी, मुझे जीवन की मिठास दे गया...
बारिश का वो मीठा पानी, मेरे खारे आंसुओं को ले गया...

Anyways when I went back to the room, H had ordered two beers for himself..so he asked me to take one. So I had my first beer ever :) It was a bit bitter but one should experience everything in life no?!
 
Anyways, then there was this party..every office party deserves a separate post..so many weird things happened and as usual I was on my detective mood and checking out who is doing what..such a desperate I am no? BTW I also had a vodka in the party..Mujhe ek ghanta lag gaya us drink to khatam karte karte..and after that when I started walking, I felt a bit dizzy..chalo thora sa hi experience ho gaya being drunk..

And you know during the party, S came to me and said that why I was not dancing as I was siting all alone, then I started telling her about what all I had seen in the party :D A called me on the dance floor many times..I felt nice..I think it's wrong on my part no? If people have to force you to dance, then why go to the party in the first place. BTW H said that I was looking the best of all people in the hat dance :) And though he doesn't remember who all he danced with...How can he find Ghodi hot who was totally coming onto him!!! And he doesn't even remember what he said to S and her fiance :P But the most funny thing in the party was when A, who was totally out came and pulled my cheeks ala woogly woogly wush like a baby. I was like what is he doing?? And G chepofying J..hahaha

And the next day we went to St. Xavier's, Bagah, Tito's and then Colva on Sunday. It was the first time I went to a Church and J said you can ask for three wishes. I asked for four wishes..one for mummy, papa, sister, and finally for you :( The gang of people I went with were just amazing. We clicked so many pictures..in so weird poses especially me, A and S! Will put a photo blog on it soon! Thanks so much for clicking my hero types pictures A and S! :) Also, I had my first cigarette photo :D And I got a tattoo also :)


And then at Tito's (such a cheap club) I saw this married couple dancing with their hands in each others neck. So I came and asked H, that does he dance like the same with R when he goes out. I know I shouldn't ask such personal questions but H ke saath to chalta hai because I think he doesn't mind. He tells me that he also dances like this with R..How sweet is that no? I have learnt this thing about him..He just tries to be funny but deep down he is a die-hard romantic..very old school 'The Wonder Years' types.. anyways, I was so badly missing you. How will I get over you ya.. I think I don't want to :{ And I have some pictures of H, which I can use for blackmail later...oooh Frenchie ;P

The thing that I have learnt for the trip is that you have to let go of yourself if you want to be happy. I am a very self conscious person, I have my inhibitions and maybe I am hiding certain things from everyone..perhaps that is why I can never let go..and that is why I feel I never be happy from inside..anyways, not to end on a sad note.. 

So here is my cosmic connection of the week..I had got this shirt in which it was written Reality is an Illusion..I wore that on the trip. And then when I was at Calengate, I was thinking of horizon...isn't it a perfect example of an illussion..it appears that sea and sky are meeting but in reality they aren't?

But the thing I regret is not being able to visit Fort Aquada. My Dil Chahta Hai moment has to wait for some more time..
Will write so more tomorrow about a very interesting unit meeting that took place in office this week!

7 comments:

  1. Detective Pankaj

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  2. Yar a 2hr flight and a few hours at the beach gave you so much to think!! Sometimes it amazes how much you pick up from your experiences, which to me appear much too normal and meveryday-like..

    And totally understand your missing "you" dude - special people are missed in all happiness..

    PS: Aguada is not the DCH wala yar.. That one is Chapora - I also have to go there - maybe we can do it together some day :)

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  3. Beer, cigarettes, tattoo..seriously looks like you were in a city of sins, and did have some wild experiences :) :)..But, we know better, right? :P

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  4. Now I HAVE to get out of this sand pit and get my A** to GOA!!!

    It amazes me - the clarity with which you describe your feelings, your surroundings and how you connect them both,,,:-)

    Wonderful post as always!..:-))

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  5. @Sumit - hehe
    @Jaspreet - I thought Aguada was DCH..my bad..and ya life bahut kuch seekha deti hai
    @Aastha - you were my sin partner BTW :P
    @Tinkerbell - Thanks as always..you have been so kind

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  6. Your point is valueble for me. Thanks!

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  7. very touching P.. your posts are so true. and this reflects your honesty.... on a different note, return my personal pics you arse..

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